Guess What Today Is!

Happy Anniversary...To Us!

Friday Cemetery Blogging

Once again foiled by the dastardly foibles of technology. Can't get me photos to upload today for love nor money. So. Perhaps we should talk amongst ourselves.

How has your week been? Mine - ok. I finished teaching the drug offender classes earlier this week. It was one of my better classes. This bothered me somewhat because the class was made up of people who were very much like me - same socio-economic/racial group. I've wondered about this for the last two weeks. Did I relate better to them because they are like me? Did they relate better to me for the same reason? Did I make more of an effort to connect with them because we are more alike? Or was it simply that their personalities meshed with each other so that they felt more comfortable being a part of the group and contributing to the discussion? I don't know, but it made me think.

Jackson is covering the island in the kitchen with (insert descriptor that rhymes with kitchen and makes for a cool sentence, but would also get your mouth washed out with soap) blue tile. Its his first tile job and looks pretty good. Props for picking out cool tiles, dude!

KaptainKatie got honorable mention on her literacy day poster - her theme was "Camp Out Your Imagination". Poor kid - all she got from the deal was a certificate and a lecture about "think how well you could have done if you'd really worked on this instead of spending thirty minutes on it the night before it was due."

Rumor has it we will all wear costumes to work on Monday. So far the plan is for everyone to wear aluminum foil hats to keep the aliens out of our brains. I'll let ya know how it turns out. (Of course, anyone going to court is forbidden from wearing their anti-alien gear.)

Check this out:

I have gone back and re-read this entry from 2nd Grade Teacher probably four times now. Read it for yourself.

Her name was Yoda, She was a Jedi...

A venerated sage with vast power and knowledge, you gently guide forces around you while serving as a champion of the light.

Judge me by my size, do you? And well you should not - for my ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is. Life greets it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us, and binds us. Luminescent beings are we, not this crude matter! You must feel the Force around you, everywhere.

That's all well and good, but I really wanted to be Darth Vader, dang it!

Friday Cemetery Blogging

Virgins promis'd when I died,

That they would each primrose-tide,

Duly, morn and ev'ning, come,

And with flowers dress my tomb.

Having promis'd, pay your debts,

Maids, and here strew violets.

- An Epitaph, #103

Thanks again to Katherine.

How to be Skewed:

"You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it." - Art Buchwald

According to NPR, today is Art Buchwald's birthday. Happy birthday Art, from your youngest fan.

When I was a kid in elementary school, we naturally had a history course each year. The only problem was we never made it past the Civil War. We'd start with the Revolution and trudge through the 18th and 19th centuries before getting totally bogged down in the Civil War. Right before school was out for the summer, the teachers would be busy trying to explain what a "carpet bagger" was without spitting. I guess it was a southern thing.

That was all well and good, but then you'd hear your parents talking about Watergate and Spiro Agnew and you'd feel a bit left out. For years I thought Gerald Ford and George Washington were one and the same person, due to my mother misunderstanding my question once during the evening news.

By the time I was in 5th and 6th grade, I was out on the streets, hanging out at the used book stores. Yeah. Ugly, but true. When I'd had my fill of kids books, I moved on to the hard stuff. That's when I found Art Buchwald.

I learned everything I know about the Watergate saga, Vietnam, and gas shortages from Art Buchwald. It was years later before I understood that Henry Kissinger was not really a funny man. And although I was old enough to experience the Reagan years, Art Buchwald explained all sorts of things about that era that my junior high social studies teachers didn't deem important.

Perhaps this is not the best way to learn about American history, but it certainly ranks among the most entertaining. So happy birthday, Mr. Buchwald!

"Mom! Mom! Who is Mary Jo Kopechne?"
(Yeah, I bet my mom thanks you too, Mr. Buchwald.)

Friday Cemetery Blogging

You've seen what happens to white marble on the east side of the state where the humidity is so high you feel like you need to flush your lungs to be able to take a good deep breath?

This is what happens to marble out here on the west side of the state where the dirt is bright red and the wind and sun bake it into place.

Google Images Meme

Google the town where you were born.

Google the town you live in now.

Google your name.

Google your grandmother's name.

Google your favorite food.

Google your favorite drink.

Google your favorite song.

Google your favorite smell.


I can't remember where I orginially saw this, so I apologize for not giving credit where it is due. Try it for yourself - its more fun than lying in the dark, trying to guess the exact second the numbers on your digital clock will advance.

Woman-Woman Strikes Again

Last week CaptainKatie and I went on our testosterone-free camping trip. When we got home, Katie's friend Ashley (who will grow up to be a tough chick - I really like this kid!) came over to play. They were finishing up a game of cards when I decided it was time to unload the truck. As I headed out the door, I asked them to help me as soon as they put up the cards.

I'd backed the truck in a little too close to the motorcycles, so I threw it in neutral to push it up a few inches so I could safely lower the tailgate. Bob T. Truck is admittedly a bit of a lightweight and you can pretty much push him around with one hand. Katie and Ashley don't know that. They came out the front door just in time to see me push the truck down the drive.

They were impressed.

Not being one to miss an opportunity, I said "You think that's good? Watch this!" I then pulled the truck back up the drive and pushed it down again! They were even more impressed.

"See Katie," I said. "I told you I was a superhero. And you didn't believe me!"

Well, neither Katie nor Ashley are dumb, so at this point they figured I was conning them. They came running down off the porch, determined to move the truck for themselves. I scoffed at their confidence and made a big show out of moving away from the back of the truck so they could give it a try. So intent were they on proving my ruse that neither one noticed me leaning in the cab to throw the truck back into gear.

The huffed and they puffed. And they puffed some more. Didn't move it an inch. Finally, miffed at their failure and unable to conceive how it had happened, they gave up and helped me unload the truck.

Monday morning I took Katie to school. We passed a car pulled up on the curb. Why did somebody park there? she wanted to know. I told her they probably had car trouble. Why would someone drive up over the curb and park to have car trouble? I then explained that I was sure they'd broken down on the road and pushed the car up the side to get it out of the way.

"Ohhh." she said. "That must have been really hard."
I nodded.
"I bet they wished you were there to push it for them! 'Cause you're a superhero!"
"Yeah!" I said. "Who am I?"
"You're Woman-Woman!"

And we laughed all the way to school.

Friday Cemetery Blogging

Many older monuments have similar decorations and style. Have you ever wondered why? It is not just what was 'in style' at the moment. Most of the embellishments have an accepted symbolic meaning. This phote is a great example:



The drape symbolizes mortality & mourning. Roses signify victory & triumphant love. The urn represents immortality. Put it all together and you have one family's expression of faith in the future - sadness for the present, recognition of love and acknowledgement that death is not the end.

Things I wonder about...

I start to snicker whenever I hear the music from the Godfather. I really have no idea why. Too many bad movie spoofs and heart-breakingly terrible Brando impersonations I guess. Although you can really never experience too many bad Brando impersonations. Not really.

Thinking of bad impersonations reminds me of William Shatner. Which makes me think I should tell you I am a recovering trekkie. "Hi, my name is SpookyRach and I am a trekkie."
I always loved the original series and thought the idea of a new series was blasphemy. Sort of like growing up on the Old Testament and all of a sudden, someone suggests a New Testament. A NEW Testament? But it turned out Star Trek the Next Generation was way all better than the original. I was even more devoted. Then they started doing more and more series and more and more movies and damn. Enough is enough. I am a former fan. (Although, I just counted and there are 74 various and sundry Star Trek novels on the shelf behind me.)

Speaking of the shelf behind me makes me think of the bookshelf beside me. On top of it is a framed copy of our engagement picture. It used to be on a bookshelf in my office. I hit it with a pen that I threw across the room. The glass cracked right down the middle - right between us. Now it looks like an ad for a divorce lawyer, so I brought it home.

I was talking to someone on the phone who had really ticked me off when I threw the pen. I recommend the occasional pen toss to relieve the stress caused by suppressing the desire to kick the crud out of a really deserving individual. It is admittedly childish, but it works.

There are 86 Perry Mason books on the shelves below the Star Trek books.

It bothers me that Disney owns the Muppets. It may well be a sign of the apocalypse.

My head is killing me and has hurt for the last two days. It hurts just bad enough to make me whine about it every 15 minutes, but not bad enough for me to actually stay home from work or anything. You can imagine how thrilled my family and co-workers are about that.

I owe my parents a drawing of CaptainKatie, the fabulous stepkid. I keep forgetting to do it.

If I write something down, I generally remember it. I don't know if it typing something on the internet has the same effect, but I hope to find out.


Sorry for the rambling, pointless entry. I felt like writing, but didn't have anything to say. Better luck next time!

I love sea lions!

Friday Cemetery Blogging

Well. This ain't it.

I had a couple of nifty little pictures picked out for ya. Nothing earth shattering or particularly witty, but a couple of grins, none the less. My modem at home has decided it is better to give than to receive. I am all for that sort of altruism, but you can't do much without an ability to receive data. Grumble, grumble, grumble.

Then, when I arrived at work, I discovered that my computer here is dead. D - E - D. Dead. Ka-put. My boss just told me he called the computer guys. They will be here "as soon as they can". Bossman admits he has no idea what that means.

"As soon as you can is like 'I'll do my best'. What the heck does that mean? And what if your best really sucks?"

So. We'll do more cemetery blogging next week - Good Lord willin' and the creek don't rise.
(Why do people even say that around here? We don't have any creeks. Just a few long and wind-y ravines that someone at the highway department likes to label as forks of the Brazos river. They aren't foolin' me, though. I know rivers are supposed to have water in them on a regular basis. So there!)

Hiss-terical

Hurricane warnings. Flood warnings. Evacuation warnings. We don't have to deal with that sort of thing much around here.

Got an email from my mom this morning. They live a couple hundred miles south of here in the oil fields.

They went to the football game last Friday night. They got a rattlesnake warning. There was some construction going on at the football field during the week and they had come across several rattlesnakes. The announcer was warning everyone to "watch yer step!"

What kind of penalty would you call for a snake bite? Ophidian foul? Illegal invenomation?

Is this weird, or what???

This really horrible, quicky scan is For Revernd Mommy:


Cue Twilight Zone theme music...

21st Century Grandparent

Of course I'm not old enough to be a grandparent. But my friends are. They are all old, old, old. Real old. Like Old Testament old. (Sometimes I like to live dangerously.)

Anyway. One of my best friends just became a step-grandmother. For the second time. This child's parents are insistent that the child will not be calling my friend simply by her first name - although that is how Rose would prefer it.

The newly parental step-child and wife are feeling giddly and inclusive and want Rose to be labelled appropriately. Of course this has caused some tensions with the other grandmothers on both sides of the family. I don't know why, but they seem somewhat intimidated by Rose, although she is quiet and retiring - almost demure. Just like me! (Snort!) Actually, Rose is intelligent, tough, opinionated, and blonde. She never lets anyone get the best of her and refuses to take any crap. But she is still a blonde, which is why we call her Rose.

The other "real" grandmothers have already chosen their names: Nana, Mee-maw, etc. Rose refuses to be called Granny, Grandma or any other such diminuative. And truthfully, those names don't fit. So, what to do?

Google it, of course! Who would've guessed that there is an entire webpage devoted to names for step-grandparents? She decided to go international and went with the Greek term for grandmother: Yaya.

Rose is definitely a yaya. And of all the grandmother names floating around - guess which name the baby will be able to say first? My money is on Yaya.

I can live with that. Sort of.

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Since you asked...

A couple of you asked how to do the"ghost" picture. It involves multiple exposures and a reeeally steady tripod.

1. Set your camera to do a multiple exposure, ie. don't advance the film between the first and second shot.

2. Find the correct exposure setting for your scene. The divide the settings in half and set your camera accordingly. By doing half the expsoure time in each shot, you end up with one correctly exposed picture.

3. Take a picture of the scene, sans "ghost".

4. Take your second shot, being very careful not to move the camera. This time, add what ever the ghost is: a person walking past the camera, an object added to the landscape, whatever.

When the film is developed, you'll have a semi-transparent image of whatever you added to the second shot. Enjoy!

Friday Cemetery Blogging

Self Portrait

Not my best work, but I really like the idea and the technique. It just needs a bit of polishing. I took this last winter in our local cemetery. (Thus the big coat.) I intended to go back during the spring to redo it, but I haven't had a chance.

5 Questions Meme

5 Things I will do before I die:
Learn to paint (pictures, not houses)
Go to Mexico and live on street food during Dia De Los Muertos
Run for public office without hope of election. (Sort of a la Kinky Friedman. I’d like to do it with Ross Pero’s money and just hang out on the campaign plane with the reporters for a year, flying around the country, causing trouble and having laughs.) (BTW-when you check out Kinky's page, stick around for the cartoon. It is so worth it!)
Have something published. (Sub-entry: actually submit something for publication.)
Own a cabin in the mountains. (Not a Unabomber-type cabin in the mountains. More of a lets-spend-a-couple-of-months-here-in-the-freakin’-summer type of a cabin.)
Get old. And wrinkly.

5 Things I say most often:
Dammit!
Have you done your 8 hours of community service this month?
Bastards!
Yeah, but its COOL!
Do you live with your wife or your girlfriend or your baby’s mother; and is that your sister in the waiting room?

5 Things I cannot do:
Cook
Sing
Act
Spit for distance and/or accuracy
Cook (Jackson said I should list that one twice.)

5 Things I can do:
Make you laugh until Coke shoots out your nose.
The Time Warp. Again.
Play well with others.
Handle whatever comes along.
Drive rental cars with wild abandon in big city traffic.

5 things that attract me to other people:
Ability to laugh, especially at themselves
A derth of fundamentalism/ultra-conservatism
Happiness
Contentment
Ability to see beyond the borders of our own little worlds

5 Celebrity Crushes:
Johnny Depp
Allan Rickman
Patrick Stewart
Janeane Garofalo
Michael Pallin

5 people who I'd like to see do this:
Do I have to pick only five? Cause there'd be more. There's Opie Capone and Gallimaufry and Captain Wow and Headless and Annie and...