Monday, May 22, 2006

The Big One Oh

Katie turned 10 today.

One day last week, faced with her looming cross-over into the double digit ages, she decided to watch country music videos instead of yet another God-awful, teeth-grindingly insipid episode of Full House before going to school. (What is the frickin' deal with Full House??? I HATED Full House when it was first on the air. And now every kid I know LOVES it! Bah!) I was pretty ok with this - as country music is slightly less insipid than those ugly-ass Olsen twins - until they aired a new Toby Keith video.

I have a big ol’ set of preconceived notions about Toby Keith and was fully prepared to hate this video. And Toby did not disappoint. The video was a cross between the The Cask of Amontillado and a snuff film. The girl in the video seemed to be portraying the dualistic message of “Oh, please don’t kill poor li’l helpless me!” and “Oh baby, you’re so hot, especially when you want to hit me.” Quality stuff! Naturally I went off on a long tirade about misogyny, mixed messages, and fantasy-land garbage. At the end of the video, Katie turned around and asked Jackson and I, “Do you think that really happened?”

We were floored. In a world where kids are so cognizant of special effects and such things, I tend to forget that they don’t filter information the same way I do. Jackson and I both gave voluminous speeches about make-believe, truth in advertising and downright misleading information that we see on television, etc, etc. She’s gone back to watching Full House before school.

That was early in the week. Towards the end of the week, we decided we were going to go see The DaVinci Code on Friday night. It is PG-13. What would we do with Katie? We finally decided to take her with us, pending a long pre-movie discussion about the meaning of fiction. Just because a movie says it, don’t make it so.

Katie was exhausted by Friday evening. I felt sure she’d fall asleep by the time the previews were over. No way, Jose. She sat wide-eyed through the whole show. Except, of course, for the obligatory trip to the restroom halfway through. At what point did she hear the call of Nature? The point where Gandolf/Magneto explains to Sophia what exactly the Holy Grail is. Pretty pivotal point, eh? Yeah. She missed all that.

When we left the theater, we asked if she had any questions.


"Why were they looking for that lady?”

Insert long explanation of the Grail theories, Gnostic gospels, bits of archeological history and a generous dose of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table as well as additional harping on the difference between fact and fiction here. Did she have any other questions?


"Uh, what’s an ancestor?”

So, the good news is she asks questions. The bad news is she and Jackson and I all have such hugely different frames of reference. It’s like the kid who asks his dad where he came from. After listening to Dad’s halting, embarrassed, long-winded explanation of sexual reproduction, the kid says that’s really interesting ‘cause Johnny came from Cleveland. Yep. Just like that.

8 comments:

booda baby said...

1. what a great blog! These are the blogs that realize the promise of what blogging can be ...
2. your profile/description has got to be in contention for all time favorite (I didn't even know I was keeping track of those things!)

annie said...

Don't blink, she'll be grown before you know it...

Jules said...

This post made me smile, then laugh, then wish the Wondergirl was 10 again.

Cherish these days. You'll be fighting for Alpha Female position soon enough. Whether you want to or not.

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

I think Katie is too laid back to ever want to be the Alpha female...she and Bebo are too much alike that way.

About the only things at my house that can be watched without being previewed now is ESPN and the news. ~sighs~

spookyrach said...

Oh no, Princess Mindy. The Alpha Female fight started on day one. It will only get worse. Will I win? Yes I will, but I don't expect it to always be a bloodless victory.

Karen Sapio said...

Kind of like when my eight year old stayed up late enough to see those commercials about erectile disfunction. THAT led to some interesting Q and A sessions. And what is up with that very fast warning at the end of those ads about erections lasting more than four hours. FOUR HOURS???? Did they specifically have Saturday Night Live sketches in mind when they wrote the ad or are they just really, really clueless???

Theresa Coleman said...

Wow. Entropy turned the big one-oh (10) on May 20 -- so they are only two days apart.

And the family went to the movies on Friday night too -- along with rev stace. The older one went with me to Davinci Code, but Entropy, the daddy and her best friend chose to go to that spelling bee movie. Probably a good choice.

Baby Gator said...

But geez have you seen the news lately?!?! Never anything good to say. So I am taking it that you liked the Da Vinci code? I really want to go see it. Maybe I will drag Gomer to the movies on Monday.