Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The Junior Picaso Club

Last year Jackson was a stay at home dad. He was the world's greatest homeroom mother. This year he is working out of town, so I am the official school-type event attender and transporter.

I am so not good at that, let me tell ya.

A month or so back, we noticed an ad in the newspaper for an after school art class at the university for kids Katie's age. T, who is one of the wackos from work, has kids about Katie's age and they saw the ad too. We worked out a plan whereby we take turns picking up the kids after school each Thursday and dropping them off at the class. That way neither of us has to miss too much work.

The first week, we both had to go so we could register the kids. I picked up Katie from school and we headed to the class where we met T and her kids. The classroom was crowed with rowdy little kids and their mothers.

T and I directed our entourage to park their cheeks in the plastic chairs while we filled out the forms and wrote the checks. We were being all task-orientated and taking care of business. We didn't know we were supposed to ask questions.

We were surrounded by a flurrying gaggle of outfitted mothers who were very concerned that their jewlery matched their capri and cardigan sets. They were also very concerned that their children get the best possible art instruction.

"What sort of mediums will you be working in?"
"How hands on will this be? Allison really prefers to hands on."
"Miss! MISS! Are we just gonna draw in here? Is that all??"
"Brendon wants to know if you will be doing any thing besides drawing. He's not yet sure whether or not he wants to stay."

On and on and on. I wrote my check and tried to back away as quickly as possible. I finally got to the door and made a run for it. I stopped outside the building and sucked in some sunshiny, mother-free air. T was standing beside me. We looked warily back towards the classroom, which was still full of fussy women and bratty kids.

T looked at me and said "I feel so white."

We went back to work and washed the cotillion dust off our hands.


see-through faith said...

rofl... mums, they are the WORST! (grin) I am always always always out of my element...

Yankee, Transferred said...

I am so used to not fitting in with other mothers, me and my raggedy-ass self. I love you for this.

Quotidian Grace said...

Fie. This story brings back some bad memories! I hope Katie enjoyed the art class in spite of the overbearing moms.

annie said...

Whew...when you said you were not the best event attender and transporter and then said you were working out a plan with "one of the wackos from work", well, I thought you were referring to one of your "clients"...and I further thought "dang, she ain't kidding, she is not much good at that"!

ppolarbear said...

this is awesome.

SpookyRach said...

Haa ha haha! Oh, Annie, you made me laugh!!! That really would be funny, wouldn't it? Or maybe not...

Captainwow said...

Thank you for saying this... See, this is what I mean when I say I don't want to be one of "them". And yet I can't put into words what it is I don't want to be. People look at me funny when I say I don't want to be a PTA mother. It isn't that I wouldn't be in the PTA, it's just that I do not care about jewelry or cardigans matching or even being ON ME!
If my kid wants to be an artist then I'll worry about all the specifics, otherwise, ARt class is usually just for fun, right? To see if they like it? or are good at it?
ok there's my rant. and probably one more reason why I like you so much.
we're not one of "THEM"!! haha

fussy women and bratty kids - that's the perfect way of putting it!

Purechristianithink said...

Once in my kids' old preschool I got in trouble for yelling. That is, it was time for the class to come inside for lunch so I hollered, "Okay everyone! Line up by me! Time to go in!" And the other Mom on volunteer helper duty that day took me aside and said,
"I'm not okay with yelling at the kids. I feel it is coersive and intimidating."

Yeah. Me and Hitler. We're best buds.