Thursday, March 10, 2005

It might be the food.

Last week was the first week of my three month rotation in County Court. Didn't see Frank this time. Towards the end of the morning, we had a hearing on a big ol' boy from Stephenville. (Actually, Lingleville, but who knows where that is?) He had gotten arrested while driving through Fake Cow County with a suspended driver's license. He hired an attorney and was pleading guilty, hopefully to be placed on probation and sent back East with the customary judicial pronouncement of "Go and sin no more!"

My customary perch in the courtroom/basement is right next to the lone window. By this time, my attention had begun to wander outside. Big ol' boy was explaining to the Judge what had happened. I didn't pay much attention, except when he said "I had moved back from Hawaii a couple months earlier and I just hadn't gotten a Texas license yet." To which the Judge replied with a lecture on how it is your responsibility to get a new license within 30 days, etc. etc. He ended his diatribe with - "I don't care where your license was from - Hawaii, was it? Probably got a damn pineapple on it."

"Worse than that," big ol' boy said. "Its a rainbow."

At this point I was leaning up against the window frame, which you can almost feel move as it strained to keep out the wind. Right now there is no sand, but the wind is starting and I remembered this is March and the sand will come. The grass looks pretty good - the jail inmates just finished mowing it for the first time. This bit of grass is one of the few in town that will remain green through the summer. At the edge of my view a couple of those dumb daffodils jumbled around, just waiting to be cut down by the last freeze. The freeze is coming too. Just like the sand.

The hearing is concluded. I make a few quick notes on my courtsheet. The Judge asked big ol' boy if he had any questions. He didn't. "I have one!" I said. "Why in the world did you move back to Texas from Hawaii??!"

"I dunno," he grinned and looked out my window. "There's just something about Texas." As he spoke he twirled his big ol' cowboy hat on his hand. He grinned again, then he turned on his boot heel and followed the bailiff from the courtroom.

8 comments:

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

I cannot tell you why but I think that this is one of my favorites of all of your blogs. He is exactly right, there is just something about Texas.

SpookyRach said...

Well, yeah, but I can imagine there must be 25 or 30 "things" about Hawaii!! Ha ha!

reverendmother said...

That's what I miss. The somethin'.

And now I'm humming Stupid Texas Song.

SpookyRach said...

Oh my gosh! Reverendmother - that is the best Texas song ever!!! How have I never heard this before?

...searchin' amazon for a recording...

bobbie said...

Fake Cow County??? please tell me you made that up! only in texas...

SpookyRach said...

Yup. I did. Our city leaders bought a whole heard of fiberglass cows a few years back, and had various local artists or groups paint them and placed them for display around the town.

Some are good. Some are bad. 'Nuff said 'bout that.

reverendmother said...

Finally! Comments are back!

Did you find a copy of the song? If not let me know and I might be able to upload an MP3 somewhere for you to download. It's the best. Although one of the lines on that page I sent is different than the audio version I have: "the sausage is the smokiest..." is instead "Our Alamo John Wayne-iest, our billionaires insane-iest."

Eh. They're both gold.

SpookyRach said...

Thanks! I found it on Amazon. What a riot!