Monday, April 27, 2009

Don’t Look Ethel!

Suppose you had a friend who really, really hates bugs.  And that friend has hired you to kill the bugs in her ofice for years and years.  Suppose your friend yells “Raaaaachel!”, every time there’s a bug.  And you go kill it.  And remove it from the premises.

And suppose one day your friend was at home with sick kid while waiting on a plumber to arrive.  While she’s at home, you have a sudden need to borrow the bottle of alcohol she keeps in the bottom left hand drawer of her desk.  (The rubbing kind, not the drinking kind.)  And just suppose that, as you were leaving the office after replacing the bottle, you notice movement next to the wall.  You look closer and It turns out to be two bugs.  Copulating.  Two big, shiny, bugs with crunchy black shells.  Goin’ at it. 

Would you just turn out the light and leave and hope your friend never reads this blog post?

18 comments:

Dijea said...

EWWWW! No one needs to hear about bugs with crunchy black shells copulating. No one. And I also think that if your friend is not in the office you don't have to kill bugs. Although it depends on what she paid you to kill said bugs that you have to do it even when she's gone. And you know she's going to read this so.......

Pyzahn said...

Really? Fornicating cockroaches?

That's a hard call. Upside: Leaving them gives you reason to smile for a long time.

Bottom line though, there are enough roaches in the world already.

Jan said...

You are evil! I love it!! (Not the bugs, the mischief!)

Tauratinswe said...

This post really bugs me!

Grandma K said...

At least they will keep you in "business!"

Anonymous said...

?? You didn't take a picture of them?

mid-life rookie said...

Cockroach procreation is never a good thing. You should have told them to get a hotel room instead of doing that out there in front of God and everybody! Preferably not a hotel room I'll ever stay in.

Flutterby said...

I am think you should seriously consider replacing the rubbing alcohol with some good tequila. Cause if she finds those bugs and their progeny, someone is gonna need a drink. Especially if she reads your post.

Lori said...

Man, you always find the cool stuff. You and my friend Sue. Though my friend Sue used to walk in on animators goin' at it.

Wish you could've filmed it. It would make a lovely holiday gift for your friend!

Cyn Huddleston said...

If two bugs (fornicate) in the room without the scaredy cat seeing them do they really need smoking?

spookyrach said...

Rookie - laughin' about your hotel room comment.

Cynthia - I'm thinking not. I'm sort of a de facto believer in karma. I sort of feel like I ought to cover my bets and smashing to love bugs didn't seem like a good idea at the time. ha!

Hot Cup Lutheran said...

so grossed out... this is why i'm not movin' south... ever.

That Janie Girl said...

I think I would have turned and walked out.

Your stories always make me laugh!

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

*snickers* she still has not read this cause I have not hear her yelling at you.

Nej said...

I used to work at a zoo...and a display of Madagascar hissing cockroaches got loose. Turns out they LOVE glue and paper. I worked in accounting. (sigh)

Every morning, we'd come in, open all the drawers and such....and shake all binders and notebooks. About once a week one of them would come flying out of a drawer at you...hissing like crazy!

You never knew when it was going to happen. Talk about adrenaline rush. (all because of a silly bug!)

spookyrach said...

Oh, nej! That is so wrong.

Flying cockroaches are the reason why I keep my butt in WEST Texas and avoid EAST Texas. Bleh!!!

Nej said...

It was oh so wrong...let me tell ya! It's one reason I'll never move to Madagascar. (hehe)

Anonymous said...

Pics or it never happened