Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Gator's Meme

I am: in charge here. Muaaaahahahahaaaa! (Probably the only thing I have in common with Alexander Haig.)

I want: world peace. (Wait! This isn't a beauty contest. Hell, I don't even LIKE beauty contests. I want a cheeseburger and some really crispy tator tots.)

I wish: I could find some cool hair sticks. The dog chewed up the last pair I had and now I can't find any that aren't cute. In fact, I totally wish for non-cute hair accessories of any kind!!! Bah! The cuteness - so irritating!

I hate: cute.

I miss: Trailer Park Boys on BBC America. I think I've made this lament before. I love that show. They claim it was fiction, but I know better. Those are the people who darken the door of my office day in and day out.

I fear: other kid's mothers. They scare me a lot. Take Joan Cusack, for instance. I love her! But, dang, her characters really freak me out sometimes. Have you seen Raising Helen? Nine Months? Gah! I have never changed a diaper. Not one. Not in my 37 years of earthly existence. I never even WORE diapers, having been housebroken at birth. (This is a fact which my own mother disputes, but I'm pretty sure she's just talkin' trash.) Katie is cool. I don't mind her. But I should be banned from all inter-parental interactions.

I hear: Tito and Tarantula in my truck on the way to work.

I wonder: whether rawhide causes any sort of intestinal blockage or anything. You can't imagine how much of it my dog ingests on a weekly basis. Rawhide is her puppy-crack.

I regret: that I shall not be buying the black and white Chuck Taylor All Stars with the 4 1/2 inch spike heels. They were too damn cool, but why tempt orthopedic fate? If I wore them, I'd be sure to break my ankle a la some horror movie blonde bimbo.

I am not: terribly graceful.

I dance: like someone who grew up in the movie Footloose and who never dated a guy who liked to dance. Dammit.

I sing: even worse than I dance.

I cry: when something is really, really funny.

I am not always: kind.

I make with my hands: currently - with Mindy's help - I'm making Dead Baby Jars. This particular lunchtime craft project has resulted in a higher than average rate of eye rolling amongst our co-workers. Rose even refuses to sit on the same side of the table as us. She keeps muttering about lightening strikes.

I write: more than you know.

I confuse: Katie

I need: more motivation

I should: start working on my master's degree. Especially since I've decided on what degree to get - English. But I don't feel like taking the time to do it. I've been gnawing on the leg that is stuck in this trap of indecision for months now. I think I've finally decided not to fight my natural slacker tendencies and to be ok with that. I shall remain woefully under-educated for the foreseeable future. Unless...

I start: way too early in the mornings. And therefore want to finish way too early in the afternoon.

I finish: stuff. Eventually. If I had more motivation, I'd finish more stuff sooner.

I tag: any of you who want to give it a try! (I actually like reading people's memes. It's fun to see the different takes that different people have with the same prompts.)

15 comments:

Dijea said...

OOhh,, I did it.

Lori said...

Oh sure *harrrummphh*. Do Gator's Meme when tagged, but ours????? Hmmmph. I call it geographic favoritism, I does. Just 'cause this one's more interesting is no damned excuse!!!

BTW, I'm with you on other kid's mothers. For the most part. There are two I can stand. But they're older and have some real life, outside kids, under their belt. I tell the rest of 'em that I run with scissors and they scamper away.

Anonymous said...

you HAVE to post a pic of the dead baby jars - that's MUST SEE!!

spookyrach said...

cool, dijea! I was hoping you would.

PG - dang!!!! I forgot all about it! *shame*

Elasticgirl - definitely! (It was all Mindy's idea!)

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

I wonder: if anyone other than elastigirl will read what you are making. Cause I think that they will have something to say about it....

just like the guys in class did when they accidently saw them.

HA HA!! You FEAR me!!

My little poodle punkin!

Just wait until you see the emo shows that I bought!

And why am I typing all of this hear when I can get up off of my big butt and go tell you?

Cyn Huddleston said...

I think the Friday Cemetary Blog from below should be titled "Footloose". I just made something for my Halloweener swap (you are not the recipient) and I hope I achieved an appropriate balance of cute and bizarre. Prolly not, Halloween is absurdly cute for a holiday about dead stuff trying to get at you.

This is apropo of absolutely nothing, but I am about to go to a good man's memorial service and I am dragging my feet.

Damn.

spookyrach said...

Mindy - you need to write about the guys. It's funny.

Cynthia - DANG!!! I knew there was a perfect name for that photo out there somewhere! I think 'dragging your feet' is certainly apropos of something...

Anonymous said...

I would have bought the Chuck Taylors anyways!! They sound way too cool.

esperanza said...

I hate cute too. Especially when someone calls me cute. Hate. That.

I also am afraid of other kids' mothers. Even before the baby was born, I was afraid of other pregnant women. Now that they are mothers, even more so. They're just so...something. So not like me, anyway.

what are hair sticks?

Rev Kim said...

I love Joan Cusack, too. Dave & I frequently quote her line from "Raising Helen" - "By the way, you aren't a bad person (delivered in the sugary-sweet mommy tone). But this is VERY BAD behavior. VERY BAD" (Delivered in the tone of crazy, hormonal pregnant woman).

spookyrach said...

bunny - the are cool. and CHEAP, too. sigh...

esperanza - they're sort of like chopsticks. when you put your hair up in a bun, you skewer it with a couple of these sticks and they hold it in place. It's better than hair pins. Uh, a friend of mine points out that its what librarians wear in porn movies so they can pull the sticks out and their hair immediately cascades down around their shoulders. ahem. Or so she says.

Kim - Haaaa! That's a great line. And soooo freakin' scary!!!

Sue said...

No time at the moment to do the meme, but I too am curious about this interesting "craft" that you and Mindy are doing over lunch....

mid-life rookie said...

What exactly are dead baby jars???

I hadn't thought about being afeared of other kids mom's, but really I find I'm so different from many of the "suburb moms" I met at the visit with the principal meeting the other night. My values are just sooooo different and I don't think its the clergy thing. Hmmm - I may have to write a post on this at my place and quit using up your space.

Anonymous said...

I'm gonna' do this on my blog; as soon as I finish catching up here...later today. I stay behind always...on the blogs, and in this other world I tackle as well. :)

annie said...

Yeah, what are dead baby jars??