First in a list of really bad ideas:
Forego your formal education, along about grade seven, for the wonders of weed. Smoke copious amounts of said plant until all higher brain functions have pretty much ceased.
2. Give up on the idea of gainful employment and instead determine to support yourself and your progeny through the glories of common theivery.
3. Make the less than fortuitous choice to break into a home without first ascertaining if said home is currently unoccupied.
4. Have the crap beaten out of yourself. This is Texas, after all, and you were just lucky the gentleman of the house did not avail himself of his sidearm while you were present in his abode.
5. Show up in court for your sentencing with an elaborate tatoo on the front of your neck, just above the collar of your bright orange inmate jumpsuit. Said large-lettered tatoo should read: "Only God Can Judge Me."