tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post6784853040804843239..comments2023-10-28T09:39:49.316-05:00Comments on Skewed View: Grandmother's Send Offspookyrachhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11652180845736295060noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-76531648014323623952007-03-19T09:07:00.000-05:002007-03-19T09:07:00.000-05:00Rach,Many condolences for the loss of your grandmo...Rach,<BR/><BR/>Many condolences for the loss of your grandmother. Our loved one never really "die" do they? They live on and on in family lore.<BR/><BR/>Ah, yes, the southern funeral. You forgot the one other salad that is almost always in attendance - the green jello with cottage cheese and marshmellows.Cowtown Pattiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07384649567351202679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-498199803578025662007-03-15T09:26:00.000-05:002007-03-15T09:26:00.000-05:00(((O))) Sorry to hear about your grandmother. Peac...(((O))) Sorry to hear about your grandmother. Peace be with you and your whole family, Aunt Louisa, included!!!<BR/> I, ,too, have had to eat at the funeral luncheons of my parishioners. I do, however, look forward to M's marinated carrots. Yummmmm. I'll take those over jello salads any day!St. Inuksukhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09948263711902058871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-5795846118098065622007-03-14T21:39:00.000-05:002007-03-14T21:39:00.000-05:00Rachel, thanks for this wonderful post. Jonboy did...Rachel, thanks for this wonderful post. Jonboy didn't really say a whole lot about the funeral (ermm, actually nothing at all) so I am delighted to have your take on it. So when are you going to write the book? You know that you have it in you.<BR/><BR/>I would have to agree with Patty about the jello salads, especially that green opaque one with pecans and other lumps (marshmallow bits?) in it.little davidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07216663347416536106noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-89181398169959368122007-03-14T16:30:00.000-05:002007-03-14T16:30:00.000-05:00I'm delurking to tell you I am sorry for your loss...I'm delurking to tell you I am sorry for your loss, and I LOVED this post!<BR/><BR/>Whenever anyone in my family dies, there's always ham, chicken casserole, fried chicken, and corn casserole. Of course deviled eggs and pie and rolls as well. And you're right about BBQ. It's just tacky to have BBQ at a funeral.<BR/><BR/>My aunt Louise was Aunt Doris Lee. And she was a cheek-pincher. Like the poster above, my cheeks still hurt just thinking about it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-14594722838260677862007-03-14T15:15:00.000-05:002007-03-14T15:15:00.000-05:00Rach, you forgot to mention the pies. Lemon and ch...Rach, you forgot to mention the pies. Lemon and chocolate icebox, always, and pecan too. At least in Mississippi.<BR/><BR/>I am sorry about your grandmother. It seems the only time all the cousins, etc. can get together is at a funeral. I really miss the type of food-oriented events you're talking about...it's what I grew up with, of course, and here in transient suburbia it is lacking. It's nice to have a meal provided at the church, but that just isn't the same as those two- or three-day affairs where you sit around the house with your relatives and closest friends, eating all the wonderful things the neighbors and church ladies brought, eating, crying, laughing, eating, talking, eating some more.zorrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00301856272073306968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-39064409026632757432007-03-14T14:04:00.000-05:002007-03-14T14:04:00.000-05:00I am so happy about your Grandmother's long life a...I am so happy about your Grandmother's long life and the love you all apparently had for her. Everything about funerals from your post resonates with me. I agree about the BBQ. It is too celebratory for a funeral for most people's sense of propriety. <BR/>When my stepfather died in Tennessee, the people of my mom's church had the after-service meal at the church in the fellowship hall. It was catered by those women of the church who also brought food to the house. We just came and ate and relaxed and visited with the folks and then were able to leave them behind when it was time for us to go unwind. Highly civilized, I think.Cyn Huddlestonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16698496590225633741noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-61124547734756629732007-03-14T06:49:00.000-05:002007-03-14T06:49:00.000-05:00Oh Spooky, how I love you!! What a great post; exp...Oh Spooky, how I love you!! What a great post; expressing many of our southern, back home, gotta' get to the funeral experiences.<BR/><BR/>This is also a wonderful tribute to your loving grandmother. A nice send-off story indeed. It is most wonderful to know there are others who believe in celebrating the lives of our loved ones who are tired and want to move on. God speed Gran!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-18186075174023896522007-03-13T21:06:00.000-05:002007-03-13T21:06:00.000-05:00"God bless you both"BWAAAAAAAHAHAHA!"God bless you both"<BR/><BR/>BWAAAAAAAHAHAHA!spookyrachhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11652180845736295060noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-17605083127519630882007-03-13T20:49:00.000-05:002007-03-13T20:49:00.000-05:00Oh, Spooky, so sorry to hear about your grandmaw. ...Oh, Spooky, so sorry to hear about your grandmaw. I bet she knew she was loved, with such a hilarious and talented writer of a granddaughter as you. I had a family friend hug me like that at my Dad's funeral, but she was so heavyset that her spine was a deep dent in her back that I nearly said "God bless you both" when I hugged her.<BR/><BR/>Now that you mention it...since I want to be cremated, I think I *will* have BBQ at my funeral.Mile High Pixiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03276750909800945131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-77878782823963971682007-03-13T20:08:00.000-05:002007-03-13T20:08:00.000-05:00I think your grandmother would have been proud.You...I think your grandmother would have been proud.<BR/><BR/>You are so right about the barbecue not being a proper funeral food! And I never thought of that till you pointed it out.<BR/><BR/>Great post!anniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10640313956929464854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-6687844500639502332007-03-13T20:00:00.000-05:002007-03-13T20:00:00.000-05:00And we always eat AFTER the service.And we always eat AFTER the service.Pattihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16725753993440817160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-64174510321420850752007-03-13T19:56:00.000-05:002007-03-13T19:56:00.000-05:00I'm sorry for your loss. I think of and miss my g...I'm sorry for your loss. I think of and miss my grandma often. I really enjoyed and learned from your reflections. <BR/><BR/>And my Aunt Louise was called Aunt June. She wouldn't let go, either; and she also pinched our cheeks. Hard. Mine hurt just thinking about it. <BR/><BR/>Funeral food here is way different. I can't imagine a funeral without at least 3 kinds of jello salad. And casseroles from neighbors. And cold cuts. And chocolate sheet cake.Pattihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16725753993440817160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-88262018871007051052007-03-13T19:22:00.000-05:002007-03-13T19:22:00.000-05:00This is a work of art.This is a work of art.reverendmotherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07457532866087494676noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-91353885969083147752007-03-13T19:11:00.000-05:002007-03-13T19:11:00.000-05:00Welcome nomas! You have evidently eaten at a lot ...Welcome nomas! You have evidently eaten at a lot of the same funerals as me. Only one thing I would change - in Texas its puh-cahn pie. We leave the pee-cans to the Georgians. ha ha!<BR/><BR/>Miss Rachel - I've never had raisin pie, but I bet you're right. It sounds like a southern dish. Poor folks food.<BR/><BR/>QG - I've always liked Jane Austen. (Hate those Bronte women, though) Thanks for the compliment!spookyrachhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11652180845736295060noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-79568833875346449922007-03-13T18:47:00.000-05:002007-03-13T18:47:00.000-05:00Came across your blog while blog surfing about a m...Came across your blog while blog surfing about a month ago. Finally, I will stop lurking and leave a comment! Love your blog; especially the Friday cemetery posts. Right now, I am surfing and watching an old movie with Bob Hope and Lucille Ball. Surely your grandmother is having a good time with them in the great beyond. Funeral food in the South? Hmm, don’t forget the iced tea, macaroni and cheese, and of course pee-can pie! J Sounds like a wonderful send off! (And I hate the hugging junk, too).No Mashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12937153685615919457noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-12939475762981628142007-03-13T18:15:00.000-05:002007-03-13T18:15:00.000-05:00Sorry about your grandmother, but this is a very a...Sorry about your grandmother, but this is a very amusing post. I have never heard of "funeral salads" but my James Beard's American Cookery book says Raisin Pie is known as Funeral Pie in some parts of the United States. I'm guessing that those parts are most likely in the South...Miss Rachelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00551030274324691717noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-5913054826811697482007-03-13T17:50:00.000-05:002007-03-13T17:50:00.000-05:00You'd make a great social anthropologist--or moder...You'd make a great social anthropologist--or modern-day Jane Austen.<BR/><BR/>God bless your grandmother. As one of my elderly friends has so sagely told me before, "there are a lot worse things than dying." Being confined to a bed in a nursing home in a failing body is certainly one of them.Jody Harringtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08031378214797420014noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-30212380315406628782007-03-13T15:58:00.000-05:002007-03-13T15:58:00.000-05:00I whole-heartedly agree, Esperanza. The pea thing...I whole-heartedly agree, Esperanza. The pea thing is disgusting, but I kinda like the carrot and raisin bit.spookyrachhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11652180845736295060noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-56165123624266337032007-03-13T15:55:00.000-05:002007-03-13T15:55:00.000-05:00You are so right on the BBQ, though I've never pic...You are so right on the BBQ, though I've never picked up on that. And are you using the word "salad" to refer to that disgusting canned pea and mayonnaise mixture? That cannot be considered actual food. The carrot and raisin thing is ok. <BR/><BR/>When my grandfather died, we got ham and broccoli. And more broccoli. And then some more broccoli. We HATED broccoli. I have no idea who actually ate it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-58613575876723671742007-03-13T15:03:00.000-05:002007-03-13T15:03:00.000-05:00If you drop bar-b-q on your shirt it makes a big s...If you drop bar-b-q on your shirt it makes a big stain BEFORE the service.<BR/><BR/>Rachel...you are in true form with this one.Princess of Everything (and then some)https://www.blogger.com/profile/15389182962616830610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7948766.post-56086691642079288052007-03-13T14:39:00.000-05:002007-03-13T14:39:00.000-05:00Sorry to hear about your grandmother. You and your...Sorry to hear about your grandmother. You and your family are in my thoughts & prayers. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for this piece on Southern funeral traditions--I laughed out loud at several places, especially the part about your aunt's full-contact hugging, and the food choices. I'd never thought about BBQ being bad form at a funeral meal, but it's true. It's somehow tacky to serve BBQ before a funeral. But I too have seen plenty of fried chicken, ham, and beef roasts. <BR/><BR/>And it's not only the potatoes that run out first...but those awesome yeast rolls. WHY?Miss Kittyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13210249894351503887noreply@blogger.com